There is a Season for Everything - Part Two

The writer of Ecclesiastes has written a brilliant statement that deserves our careful consideration of its meaning:

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens...a time to be born and a time to die." Ecclesiastes 3:1-2

In a previous blog post in July of 2021, I told the story of a major health crisis that changed everything for my mom and stepdad. We were now face-to-face with a season of life that requires a new approach for my mom and stepdad.

It quickly became clear to us that mom could no longer live alone. A wonderful couple in our church, Rick and Denise Guttenberger, own Senior Care Referral Services here in Oklahoma City. I cannot begin to tell you how helpful they were in helping me find the right place for mom. If you find yourself in this season with your family, I highly suggest you get in touch with them.

Last summer, Kim and I spent a few weeks in Colorado. When we arrived home from Colorado, I headed to the nursing home to check on my stepdad, only to discover that his sons had moved him to a nursing home in Indiana. They had full power of attorney and chose to have their father close to them so they could provide the care he needed. We fully understood and supported our stepbrothers’ decision to move their father closer to them. While it was very confusing for mom, this was a good move for them, and certainly a good move for their dad.

We then had to decide what to do with a house full of stuff. Mom's possessions were important and valuable to her. They were ever-present fixtures in mine and my brother’s lives. Mom had accumulated those things without hindering her and dad's ability to provide Joey and me with the best life two boys could ever have. But at the end of the day, her possessions were no longer needed, and Joey and I knew it was time to let them go and be enjoyed by those who would never know the role they played in our mother's life and home.

We were encouraged to have an estate sale. We hired a lady in our church who handles these types of situations and she was very helpful. Every remaining possession was neatly placed on tables throughout the house. Things like mom's Christmas decorations that appeared in our living room over the past fifty-plus years. The dishes she collected and were like an old friend that had held the finest home-cooked meals one could imagine. The paintings and art she had proudly collected and displayed in her home throughout the years. Candelabras, punch bowls, tablecloths, silver flatware, high quality and expensive furniture, a beautiful grand piano...and it was all for sale, no longer needed by anyone in the family, no longer cherished by the one who had enjoyed these things for decades.

The grand piano sold. The house sold. Most of the furniture was sold. What remains are the framed memories packed in boxes and sitting in my garage.

The words of Paul in 2 Corinthians 5 have been read, studied, and sermonized for many years in my ministry. While I knew intellectually what they meant, I was not prepared for what those words meant when my mom's "earthly tent" started being taken down.

"For we know that when this earthly tent we live in is taken down (that is, when we die and leave this earthly body), we will have a house in heaven, an eternal body made for us by God himself and not by human hands." 2 Corinthians 5:1

I have also been painfully yet joyfully reminded of the text that says, "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." Psalm 90:12

Our mom is doing well in a wonderful place that takes great care of her. My brother and I married two fabulous women who are very kind and gracious to our mom. They make sure she gets to the nail shop, the beauty shop, and has the basic essentials she needs. Mom purchased a long-term care policy nearly twenty-five years ago. She wanted to be sure she would not be a burden to me and Joey. That policy is helping us provide excellent care for her. She has no idea how much the policy has impacted her life in this season. I urge everyone to invest in a long-term care policy. Your family will thank you.

We are adjusting to this new season of life for our mom. Every visit is a reminder of the "brevity of life" and for me, it is a stark reminder that life happens at a pace we cannot comprehend. I suggest you carefully value every day and pray for wisdom to make the best of them.

There is a season for everything...