40 Lessons in 40 Years
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Here are forty lessons I've learned in forty years of ministry:
If you want to hear God laugh, tell him your plans.
When God opens a door leading you in a different direction, make sure God opened it, and once convinced, head down that path.
God's plan for you will unfold one step of faith at a time.
There is significant reward for doing the right thing, for the right reason, at the right time, for a long time.
There will be trials of many kinds in life. Don't make major decisions in the midst of those trials.
Perseverance will be your friend. Pray for that friend daily.
When we all start out in life, we really don't know very much. Stay faithful and the lessons will be learned along the way.
I've never enjoyed being around people who are cocky and arrogant.
Don't mark off the arrogant among you. They will mark you off. Wait for it.
Don't pretend to know how to do something if you don't know how to do it.
Pastor, if you can't seem to stay in a church more than three or four years, you're the problem.
Pastors are shepherds. You are called to love, protect, and serve the sheep. If you can't do that, find another career path.
Remember, sheep are the dumbest animals on the planet.
Jesus said we are all like sheep.
There are four key people in your life...your mate, a very close friend, a spiritual mentor, and a good counselor. Make sure you have all four of these people on speed dial.
Marriage is like any other item of value in your life. Protect it, treasure it, fight for it.
Choose a life partner carefully. Plan for a lot of conversations and counseling before you walk down the aisle.
The Bible tells husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church. That means you're willing to die if necessary.
Find people who've been married for a long time and learn from them. Ask them the hard questions.
My friends who've been married for decades had dark seasons in their marriage. They learned much in those seasons and didn't give up.
Marriages will not survive the long haul unless they've learned the art and grace of forgiveness.
There is something very special about marriages when you know the worst about each other and still love each other.
Stay humble, accountable, and teachable.
Don't "fake it till you make it." No one wants to be around a fake.
Never teach about raising children until you've had a few... for quite a while.
You won't be an expert at anything until you've faced the pain that brings understanding.
The kindest, most loving, and most forgiving people are those who have faced the reality of pain.
As a young pastor, I thought I knew everything about divorce. Then my parents went through one.
You have no clue what someone is going through if you haven't been through it.
As a leader, you are only as good as the people you put around you.
There will be challenging seasons when you must be willing to step up, learn, and press on.
There will be challenging seasons where the best thing to do is step back, find silence, pray, meditate, and think.
You will know more after forty, fifty, or sixty years than you do now, but you will continue to feel inadequate in some areas of life.
Think carefully before you offer advice to someone ten years older than you. They understand more about life than you do.
Having children will bring the highest of highs and the lowest of lows in life.
Raise your kids in a great church that oozes grace and kindness. They will never settle for any other kind of church.
Be prepared to handle their seasons of doubt, and keep in mind some universities are determined to destroy any anchors you've placed in your kids.
Your children may be in their thirties or forties or fifties, but they are, in your eyes, still your kids and still need your advice. Just make sure they ask for it before you offer it.
Having grandchildren is a golden opportunity to annoy your children.
Spoil your grandchildren, give them everything they want, and never say no. It may be very aggravating to your children–but that's the point.